There are no difficult books just difficult authors, all bunged up to Hegel with systematic, deliberate obfuscation, intent on a Freemasonry of Fictive Arts, or much more likely, an exegesis of Fictive Frameworks so covert as to be ciphered for a public the size of a Seminar.

Brief are the motorways between our synapses and over-burdened with tired archers, small tennis players and royal detritus. Which is why I (and by extension, you) have taken the decision to fillet the geist of this nasty country live on BBC Radio Orkney as soon as possible.

Fighting with my conscience, raddled by centuries of inherited oppression and welding, nevertheless, in the tradition of Direct Action I have resolved to monster the pathetics of Orkney by phoning in when they are next on air, and let the world pick up the pieces, if it can.

Noam Chomsky and the Tribute Band "Bardamu" would like me to tell you that I will have in this powerful and dangerous undertaking, their full moral support.

I must also tell you that if this Action is traced back to me, I will inevitably die, however, one of our operatives in Kirkwall will attempt to tape Good Morning Orkney and save for posterity, the fruits of my subversion.